The Not-So-Midday Snack

Welcome back, friends!

And an extra special welcome to my new subscribers! 

The past week or so has been quite the whirlwind, so today’s issue will be a bit shorter than usual. That being said, I’ve encountered some interesting content and learned a few lessons this week, so let’s get into them…

Betting on Myself

The Queen (allegedly) once said, “I don't like to gamble, but if there's one thing I'm willing to bet on, it's myself.” The queen I speak of is Beyonce, obviously. And while I’ve always deeply admired that quote and the self-assuredness/confidence/general badassness behind it, I’ve never actually put it into practice. To truly bet on yourself, you must first have an unshakeable belief in yourself, which hasn’t exactly been my thing. 

Thanks to a significant amount of introspection and work on myself, I’ve developed more of that feeling in the past year. This week, I took it all to the next level by signing up for a week-long writer’s retreat and an acting class in the spring. I’ve spoken at length about my efforts to dive back into the writing world and bring all of my ideas to life, but stepping into acting is a whole other beast. For one, I haven’t acted in anything since I involuntarily played the lead in my high school English class’ rendition of Lysistrata. Needless to say, it wasn’t my best work. Regardless, I’m excited for the opportunity to push myself out of my comfort zone and see what I discover about myself in the process. 

I’ve learned that sometimes, the bet on yourself can be making an investment in your growth and operating with the intentionality to follow that investment through. I look forward to sharing my learnings from both experiences with all of you. 

Shout Out to the Public Library

I got my first DC library card last week and decided to peruse the shelves at the branch in my neighborhood. I picked up “The Body in Question” by Jill Ciment and crushed it in a day. The book follows two jurors on a murder trial as they engage in an affair that ultimately impacts the course of the trial. While I thought the plot was a bit rushed and the ending could have used a bit more meat, the details of the trial, the buildup of the affair, and the inevitable fallout from it kept me drawn in. The subplot about the potentially evil twin’s involvement in the central crime of the trial was a bonus. 

I also picked up “On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous” by Ocean Vuong, which is a stunning letter from a son to his immigrant mother about their troubled relationship. Vuong’s writing is so poetic and beautiful that it brought a tear to my eye from the very first page. Parts of the writer’s story are deeply troubling and traumatic. He spends a significant amount of the book outlining in great detail the inexplicable depth of a mother’s love and how complicated parental relationships can be.  

Laying the Groundwork for a Future Life 

I follow a TikToker named Miriam who uses her platform to synthesize the things she’s reading, watching, and listening to each week. She is probably one of the most impactful creators I’ve encountered on the platform and she regularly posts videos about topics that keep me thinking for weeks after I’ve watched them. In a recent video, she talks about what it means to develop the skills, tools, and resources now that help us become the type of people we want to be in decades to come. For example, if you want to be the kind of parent or head of household that is welcoming and inviting to the friends of your children, you can start by acting as a warm and inviting soul to the people around you now. 

I often express a desire to be a certain way in the future. I want to be a particular kind of partner, mother, and career woman. But in that expression, I’ve inadvertently kicked the ball to future me to be that kind of person rather than working now to be her. If I want to be a wise and accepting mother, I can start by expanding my wisdom and being less judgemental of others now. If I want to be a supportive and dynamic partner, I can exercise that work now. There are so many examples of how shifting that thinking to the present can help facilitate deeper relationships with ourselves and the people around us. I’d love to hear from you about some of the ways you might be doing that work, or aspiring to do it. Let’s talk in the comments below. 

That’s it for this week. 

Until next time!